12 May 2013

Mother's Day Reminiscing . . .

I know I am borrowing from a photograph last year.
But then, I am also borrowing the essence of today
from a woman who was a mother
and played the role inspired by her mother.

Needlessly, I was my Mama's baby.
From the time I was born in her menopausal years
she worried about my state of health and sanity.
Would I turn out normal?
Would I get over my boredom with school?
Would I be able to restrain my hyperactive self?

Yes, I turned out normal 
if by normal meant I can go to school
and mind my manners . . .

No, I was forever bored with school.
I would complain about it from nursery school to my college years. 
I can not concentrate. The birds distract me a lot. I get sleepy . . .
How my mother survived my moods and impatience
is indeed a virtue.

I was, and is, hyper.
I talk faster than a speed of light.
I work and do things at the same speed.
Mama always worried about my quirkiness
but then she was most proud of my multi-personality:
I can do/learn a lot of things in seconds.
I was a handy gofer since I was a kid.
And I still am.

Some mothers fear for their children.
My mother feared for me all her life
and yet, in her deathbed,
when she feared death hovering
I was her quirky nurse
telling her not to be afraid because I wasn't.
To let go and leave all her worries in her old sick body.
To fly to the moon, dance in London,
watch fashion in Paris, attend mass in Rome,
and meet my Papa in heaven . . .

And when she finally left
with a smile on her face
I felt fear engulf me.
With no one to encourage and inspire me
I felt vulnerable and alone.

But mothers do not really leave their children.
Somewhere, somehow, some strange wonderful moments
will make it known
that the bond is always connected.

. . . colorful threads, novena prayers, scents of roses and rose petals,
church bells ringing for angelus, the lace fan and veil,
the soft warm tummy, the cheekbones, red nail polish,
red lipstick, sunset sighs, dog hairs,
sewing machine and beaded bag.

Happy Mothers day to everyone!
May you always connect to the one who gave birth to you . . .


Lisa Gordon said...

She surely was one special lady, Lui, and what a beautiful post this is.

Sending you hugs, and please give "my" big boy lots of hugs and kisses. xo.

Pat said...

Lui, this is such a beautiful tribute to your mother. I've been really missing my mother who passed away in 2012, but memories of her bring a special warmth to my heart.

DeniseinVA said...

Hi Lui, so happy to see you posting and understand how busy you have been. I have missed you and you started back with a beautifully touching post about your sweet Mom. I loved reading this and learning about her. Have a great day my friend :)

Viola said...

So lovely and honorable post you've made Lui! :) I feel you are such a kind person and that must be your mum was same as you, I think.. :)

Beautiful photos, no matter from which time.. I always love your photos!

In my country we celebrate mother's day on the second Sunday in February each year :)

Your friends, viola and pusa :) ^^)

The Chair Speaks said...

Your mom loved you lots!